Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
