ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
