I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
