? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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