How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Drunk is not a location!
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