Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
