great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
40s are totally the cure
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize