Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize