My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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