i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize
