Why are handjobs necessary in class?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
