god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
