She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
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