I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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