I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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