The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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