hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize