Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
