So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
