My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize