i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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