I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
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