My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
