Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
