I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize