Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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