Midget sex pt 2 tonight
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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