I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Randomize
