did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
its not stalking. its research.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
