i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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