I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize