Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
