We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize