So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize