I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
