Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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