if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
