as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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