i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Randomize
