the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
My life is pants optional.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
