Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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