So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
