Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Just took my morning after pill in the library
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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