i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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