My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
