How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
