looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
