Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
