when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
