hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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