Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
