then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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