I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
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